How to Handle Being Passed Over for Promotion

Let me share some thoughts on navigating what's honestly one of the tougher situations we face in our careers - getting passed over for a promotion, especially when you have to work with the person who got "your" job.

First, let's acknowledge that wanting to quit after not getting the promotion is a totally normal reaction. When we put ourselves out there for a role we really want, and then don't get it, it stings! It can feel like a punch to the gut, especially if you've been with the company or organization for a while and really know your stuff.

Why Do External Candidates Get Picked Over Internal Candidates?

Here's the interesting thing about why organizations sometimes (not always) pick external candidates. They often get caught up in what I like to call the "shiny new toy syndrome."

You know how when you're shopping, sometimes the new, unfamiliar option seems more exciting than what you already have? Hiring committees and boards can fall into the same trap. They might get dazzled by an outside candidate's different experiences or fresh perspective, even though their internal candidates (like you!) have incredibly valuable knowledge about how things actually work in the organization.

Making a Choice

Now, let's talk about what to do when you find yourself in this situation. You have a choice, and it's a bigger one than it might seem at first. You can either help your new boss succeed or... well, not. And while it might be tempting to let them stumble (we're all human, after all), how you handle this situation says a lot about who you are as a leader.

Think about it this way: Everyone is watching how you handle this disappointment. It's like being in a play where you didn't get the lead role - you can either be the professional who helps make the whole show better, or you can be the person muttering complaints backstage. And trust me, people remember which one you choose!

Here's what's really interesting about external hires - they often don't stick around as long as internal promotions, especially when they're replacing someone who's been there a long time. I call them the “beloved” because although there may have been grumbling about their performance or leadership, as soon as someone new shows up, everyone suddenly loves the leader who left.

So, if you like your organization and want to stay in the game for future opportunities, the smartest move is to be the person who helps make things work, not the one who points out every mistake.

But - and this is important - being supportive doesn't mean ignoring your own growth. Use this as a chance to learn what made the other candidate more appealing. Was it certain experiences you haven't had yet? Or are there skills you could develop? This information needs to be the compass for your own professional development.

Remember, being passed over for a promotion isn't the end of your story - it's just one chapter. How you write the next chapter is entirely up to you. And who knows? The grace and leadership you show in handling this situation might just make you the obvious choice next time around or for another opportunity.

Think of it this way: Your response to disappointment is actually a chance to show everyone exactly what kind of leader you are. Are you someone who can put the team's success first, even when it's personally challenging? That's the kind of leadership quality that's way more valuable than any single promotion.

Next Steps

Is your organization or department going through a major transition? Are there members of your team you are worried about losing because they aren’t quite ready for the next role? Or maybe you will have to help manage the person who got passed over. Either way, we are here to help. The Leadership Career Program is the perfect coaching package to help retain individuals who are valuable but may be at risk for leaving.

Book a free appointment to discuss your specific situation. http://ncdconsult.com/