Why? Can Be THE Most Effective Question

Are you someone who people often bring their problems to? Do you find yourself spending a lot of time advising others on how to solve their problems?

Do you find that with some of those people, no matter how many times you advise them or provide solutions, they show up again and again, stymied by the same challenge in a different situation?

The next time someone shows up seeking help, there is one thing you can ask that will propel them to gain deeper insight which leads to sustainable change: “Why?”

• Why is this a problem for you?

• Why do you think this problem occurred?

• Why will it matter if you are able to solve this problem?

• Why is it necessary to figure this out?

A “why” question can be the gateway that leads to deeper insights about what’s behind the problem.

As people struggle to answer the “why” question, they identify ways in which they can take action that will actually create change.

Them: “I can’t stand preparing the monthly board packets!”

You: “You tell me that every month. Why is that?”

Them: “It’s always a rush at the last minute. I feel like I get it done just in time”.

You: “Why do you think that happens?”

Them: “I have to wait for people to get information to me. Some people barely make the due date. Others miss it entirely. And it holds me up”.

You: “Why do you think they wait until the last minu

Them: “It just seems like it’s not a priority for them”

You: “Have you asked them why they can’t get their stuff to you sooner?”

Them: “Well. No. But I guess maybe I could”.

You: “That seems like a good idea”

"Why?" is a powerful but simple question that breaks the chain of repetitive complaining. 

Plus, it takes the pressure off of you and you're empowering them to find their next step.

So, the next time you think “Oh no, not this again,” ask “Why?”